Over the past few decades, virtual visitation has become an increasingly popular and potentially meaningful way for separated or divorced parents to stay connected with their children.
With that said, while younger kids may be easily engaged with games or bedtime stories, keeping older children and teenagers interested during virtual visitation sessions can be more difficult. However, with a thoughtful approach, virtual visits can still be meaningful and help families maintain strong parent- child bonds.
Personalized, thoughtful approaches are best
Older kids, especially teens, crave autonomy and may be less enthusiastic about scheduled video calls. If you have teenagers, rather than forcing formal conversations, try to meet them where they are. This could mean texting before a video call to see what works best for them or asking about their preferred communication method—some teens might feel more comfortable connecting via phone calls, text messages or even shared online activities rather than face-to-face chats.
Incorporating shared interests into your virtual time can also make the experience more engaging. For example, you could watch a show or movie together using a streaming service with group features, play an online game or work on a virtual project together, like creating a playlist or planning a future trip. Even casual conversations about school, hobbies, music or current events can go a long way in showing your interest and building trust.
It’s also important to be consistent without being overbearing. Keeping regular virtual visitation appointments helps reinforce reliability and structure, which are especially important during a time when older kids may already be navigating emotional and developmental changes. That said, showing flexibility and understanding if they occasionally reschedule or cut a call short is equally valuable.
Virtual visitation is not about screen time—it’s about relationship building. If the connection feels authentic, older kids are more likely to stay engaged.
